So, it’s been a month since my first diary entry and it’s fair to say the last 30 days really haven’t gone to plan. Various celebrations, rota changes and holidays have meant my routine is pretty much non-existent, and I’ve been finding it really difficult to schedule time for my workouts. Of course, I know I could have found a way to fit them in, but a serious drop in motivation and a busier social life have done a great job of interfering with my ability to stick to any sort of routine.
I could so easily beat myself up for this, and I have to an extent, but the truth is, I don’t want to. Yes, I’ve fallen out of my routine. Yes, I’ve been eating less than perfectly and yes, I’ve made excuses and gone out for drinks and dinner rather than squeezing in a gym session after work. None of these things are conducive to maintaining a killer workout plan, but they’re not going to kill me either. And I needed them. One thing I really struggle with is balance, and as someone with an extremely addictive personality, I have to work extra hard to make sure I’m not neglecting certain aspects of my life in favour of something else. In this case, I was putting my very real need for time with my friends and family over my need to train. Now, while spending time with family I hadn’t seen in over a year and knocking back the odd margarita with the girls gave me a real boost, I used these occasions as an excuse to ‘forget’ about why I started to train in the first place.
I’ve managed a couple of mini sessions after work and being on holiday means I’ve walked a fair amount, but I really haven’t been focusing on smashing my workouts and going until I just can’t anymore. This is a big deal for me, as I generally get my biggest endorphin hit when I’m cursing my trainer on the floor in a puddle of sweat. If I’m not pushing myself to that point every time, something in my brain tells me I don’t deserve to feel any sense of accomplishment and that really sucks because any workout, no matter how short, is something to be proud of when everything in your mind is screaming at you to get back into bed.